Wednesday, August 22, 2012

EPIC PRANK

So my brother moved in with me for what was supposed to be only a few months. This was 18 months ago. During these 18 months he has continuously pranked me. Now, on his 21st birthday, he has decided to move out and back to Phoenix from Vegas. Of course, I had to send him off with a bang!

So here's what happened, my brother packed all his stuff up in a UHaul and towed his truck back to Phoenix a week ago. He left only a few things behind including his prized performance/show/sports car with intentions of driving back up this weekend with my sister, celebrate his 21st b-day in Vegas and then drive it home.

The Car:




The Prank:
I had a few awesome customers of mine brainstorm a few prank ideas. What we decided to do was have them call my brother and claim there was a report of stolen parts on his car and the vehicle was impounded. He is in a different state than his vehicle and not expected to be in town for another day.

As if that wasn't classic enough....

"Detective McNeese" called Daniel to inform him not only was his car impounded, but they are disassembling the entire vehicle to inventory every part and are re-possessing all stolen parts. In fact, the vehicle is up on blocks in the shop now-completely dismantled.

Then our wonderful "Detective" throws him for an even bigger loop: his sister (me) and brother-in-law (my husband) have been taken into custody on suspicion of running a stolen car parts ring. Apparently, Daniel's car was part of a huge sting operation that came to their attention when he took it in for some routine maintenance a few weeks ago. We will be held in police custody until Daniel shows up with the proper paperwork including: the title, registration, birth certificate and state id, phone records, social security card, etc.

After my brother freaks out on the "Detective" and almost breaks out into tears...TWICE...it is my turn to call him from my jail cell.

I eventually got my sister in on the prank so she could set up video of the reveal and after over 2 hours of my brother back and forth trying to find a lawyer and a way to get to Vegas tonight, I let him in on it all being an elaborate prank.

Sunday, June 3, 2012

Becoming a Writer

Becoming a writer is a lot harder than I thought it would be. I'm not one to shy away from hard work. I simply enjoy my time more when I put off the hard work until the last possible minute. You might call me a bit of a procrastinator. But I love to read and I love to write. The problem? I can't finish what I start.

I see the beginnings of a story in my mind. A scrap of something, really. Not much of anything, but it wiggles it's way into my skull and consumes all my thoughts forcing me to work it out. The plot fits together like pieces of a broken puzzle and I'm the only one who can see the big picture. I outline and characterize and subplot my ass off until *click* it all falls into place. The story. Maybe it's a novella, maybe it's a trilogy, but I figured out what motivates my characters. I know their strengths and weaknesses. I picture the settings clearly and I see the romance and adventure unfold.

In my head these scenes play out like clips from an upcoming film. The trailer for my magnificent masterpiece. I love every bit of the world and story arc I just designed, but therein lies the problem. I write but am all out of words to say. The details and descriptions elude me. I'm stuck with this sensational story but re-telling it doesn't do it justice. It's hard work for a perfectionist like me to describe every piece of the picture I see in my head. I write and revise and edit and scratch it all out in the end.

I was so proud of myself for achieving 23k words-about 1/3rd of my planned novella penned-when boredom betrayed me. How could I make this story more interesting? By setting it up with a 2nd, 3rd, and even a 4th book. I put aside my rough draft and began planning the sequels. Stupid, huh? Once again, I figured out all the secrets of my story and continuing was no longer fun. It was just difficult.

Inspiration struck again and 3 days and 18k words later, I was 2 chapters and 3/4 outlined into a new story. Something completely different. Within two weeks, I was stuck again. I can't call it writer's block if I know what I want to say. I just don't know how to say it. How can I convey the emotions my characters make me feel? How do I describe the mundane settings as magical? How do I sustain a reader's interest if I lose interest myself after only a few weeks?

I have read a book a day for the past 9 days desperately seeking an answer. What makes it possible for one person to complete their story, but not another? It isn't for lack of ideas, it's lack of talent. Am I a writer because I write? Or should the title be bestowed on only those with completed works? At what point does a writer become an author?

Sunday, April 22, 2012

One Sweet Mofo

What's better than a tasty alcoholic beverage? That same adult drink in a sweet cupcake form! I bring you, the Screwdriver Cupcake!!!






For those of you unfamiliar with a Screwdriver, mix vodka with orange juice to taste. So easy a child could do it (though not recommended). So how, you ask, do you make a screwdriver cupcake? Even easier! (Not really, I am using literary embellishment-baking a cupcake from scratch is actually more difficult and time-consuming than mixing a drink.) I actually adapted the recipe from The Recipe Link. (Recipe copied below with my notes in purple). With a drink in hand and a helper in the kitchen, Daniel and I set forth to conquer the Screwdriver Cupcake.



The Cupcake:
3 eggs
1 1/2 sticks unsalted butter
1 1/2 cups sugar
2 teaspoons grated orange zest **I didn't feel like doing this, so I mixed in 2 tsp orange marmalade instead.
2 1/2 cups flour
2 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup orange juice **I used Simply Orange No Pulp-it really is the only way to go!
1/2 cup orange-flavored vodka **I used regular Smirnoff vodka because I forgot it needed to be orange-flavored at the grocery store when I bought it and my husband even asked me if it should be, we argued-he was more correct than I was.

1 cup sweetened flake coconut **I absolutely DESPISE coconut so I left this out.

1. Preheat to 350 degrees F. Line cupcake pan.

2. Beat eggs until pale and foamy. In a mixing bowl, cream butter; mix in sugar and orange zest (orange marmalade). Beat in the eggs; set aside. 
3. In a bowl, combine flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. (I enlisted my brother, Daniel, to help with the heavy lifting).


4. In another bowl, mix together orange juice and vodka. 
5. Add flour and vodka mixtures to egg mixture in three alternating additions. Fold in coconut (If you want...). Divide batter into muffin cups. 

**The recipe should make 12 cupcakes. I fill my cups 3/4 full and wound up with 12 regular-sized cupcakes and enough batter leftover for 24 mini cupcakes. 



6. Bake for 21-23 minutes. Let cool completely before frosting. 

**I baked my large cupcakes for 20 minutes and they came out slightly harder than I like. The mini cupcakes stayed in for 10 minutes and were perfectly spongey when they emerged

I couldn't wait to eat one. It was worth the burnt tongue!!


The Orange-Vodka Buttercream:

3/4 stick unsalted butter
2 cups confectioners' sugar
1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract
3 tablespoons orange juice
1/2 cup heavy cream
3 tablespoons vodka

1. In a mixing bowl, cream butter and sugar 3-5 minutes or until light and fluffy. **My lovely assistant mixed this concoction for 5 minutes to lumpy sugar results. We nuked the mess for 10 seconds to no avail. finally, we added the vanilla in early and mixed for another 5 minutes until light and fluffy. 


2. Mix in vanilla, orange juice and cream. Fold in vodka. **After we added the orange juice, the icing was way too watery. My brother, the helper, mixed on medium setting for 2-3 more minutes until it thickened, then we added the cream and mixed for another 2-3 minutes. after adding the vodka, I tried folding the icing, as instructed, but it was so runny and then the sugar began to lump. I threw it back under the blender until it thickened and was fluffy. 




**I added red and yellow food coloring to give the icing an orange tint and then experimented with different piping and sprinkle for fun!

The Result:
My brother, my husband and I actually really liked this recipe! The cupcake mix, before baked, tasted a lot like a sugar cookie with a hint of orange. I suppose if I actually used the orange zest and orange-flavored vodka, like instructed,  it probably would have been a lot stronger, but it was still super tasty! The icing had more orange flavor, but it wasn't over-powering. Overall, the cupcake tasted very light and was perfect for the start of summer. 



Cupcakes did not actually result in underage drinking. 










Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Facebook Ruins Lives

As a writer, I place great value on my First Amendment Freedom of Speech. I hate bigots, hypocrites, racists, sexists and otherwise intolerant, ignorant idiots. And preachy Christians. Let's not forget those MF's. But damn-it-all if they don't have the right to say whatever they want (as long as it isn't in the workplace). Conversely, I have the right NOT to listen. My mom exercises her right daily. She's deaf. It's a joke. You don't have to laugh.

I have a very blunt and abrasive personality. I lack even a basic filter and "sugar-coating" is not something I excel at. Or even try to. Why waste time mincing words? Life is short and we should be open and honest. Now, I don't try to be mean, but sometimes, I don't realize what I say is mean. Feel free to take whatever I say with a grain of salt. Add a sarcastic undertone so you know only every other words is how I really  feel. Or, simply, tune me out. Stop reading. Ignore everything I say.

But what happens someone who loves the First Amendment and passionately spouts off anything with a hint of feeling or reasonable logic without consent from every second cousin and their mother is a member of your family? What happens when all that dirty laundry gets aired on Facebook?

Simply put, FACEBOOK RUINS LIVES.

It's true. It's common sense nowadays that you should not put up inappropriate pictures that dictate lewd and vulgar behaviors, habits, and/or vices on to the interwebsnetulars. Last weekend's party pictures could be ground from expulsion from school for underage drinking. If you want to send a naked picture to your girlfriend, but you are a baseball coach who "friended" several parents and students and accidentally posted those pictures publicly, consider yourself out of a job. It's dangerous stuff to submit any personal information to the web. So how do people everywhere remain employed when nefarious websites like Facebook exist?

Loose example of a Facebook life-ruining post: "My family is made up of fucktards." (I would apologize for that language, but it defeats the purpose of the point I'm making). Now, a family member is upset that this post casts them in a bad light and could prevent them, from being hired.

Let's delve into their fully-legitimate concern:

1. Nobody wants to hire a fucktard. If even your family thinks you are a fucktard, that doesn't bode well with a potential employer. And if they are willing to post it on Facebook for the entire world wide web to see, they  REALLY think you are fucktard and everyone should know.

Now, let's delve into why their concern is complete and utter BS designed to trample my First Amendment right to free speech and mask the fact that are just too chicken-shit to say what you really want to. You don't like me and want to make me out to be the bad guy. You really are a fucktard.

1. Fucktard is a derogatory slang comprised of "fuck" and "-tard." "Fuck" can be good or bad. If I say "Fuck you, you crazy fool," it appears I am telling you to piss off, I don't appreciate you or what you may have just said/done. However, maybe you were cute and I am joking. Really, you can only tell my true meaning by my tone and personality and our relationship. Tone is not easily derived through writing, especially in a short message like that. Remember: Only you have the power to prevent misunderstandings. However, surrounding words can provide contextual clues. "That sex was fucking good," uses "fuck" in a positive manner replacing it for "really" and "very" and emphasizing how "good" the sex was.

Now, let's examine "-tard." A "retard" refers to a slowing down or hindrance, as in a machine. It is commonly, although disparagingly used to describe people are mentally handicapped or learn something slowly. When tacked onto "fuck", a "fucktard" becomes shortened slang for "fucking retard" meaning the person who made the statement believes the subject is (negative adjective)(slow at something). This could be good or bad, but it's safe to assume it's not a nice statement. Just because it isn't nice doesn't make it any less true. And my First Amendment Right protects me to voice my opinion.

2. We have decided that "fucktard" is a nasty name that has no business being referred to family members and is damaging to their reputation. Or, is it? First of all, if the statement is accurate, anybody who knows you knows it is true. If they don't know you well enough to know it's true, they will soon find out. If they are hard-core you-supporters, it won't matter what anyone else says, it will just make them look hateful and you look the victim. "But will an employer who sees this post even give me the chance?" you ask yourself. Honestly, I don't know. But IF they do see this post, there is no reference to you. No names are given. "Family" is vague. It could include siblings, parents, grandparents, cousins, aunts, uncles, second cousins, great-aunts, godparents, step's and in-laws. Since your name is not specifically "tagged," there is no way for an employer to pinpoint you are said "fucktard." Many people have disagreements with family (immediate, extended or otherwise) from time-to-time and may exaggerate their frustrations. I'm sure any reasonable employer would disregard this comment completely when doing a thorough background search on you. I'm also positive there are way worse things popping up in your background search than this dismissive comment.

Facebook, your potential employer has no way of knowing (nor would they really care to this extent) who every member of your family is and what their relationship is to you. You have full control over who you list as "family" and if someone calls you a "fucktard" and you still list them as family, you really are a fucktard.

3. Let's focus on the IF, now. You are worried IF an employer sees this. The post doesn't specifically mention you by name, therefore not tagging you, therefore, not appearing on your FB page. It may show up in your newsfeed, but not in a public view. An employer, and all your friends (who are not mutual friends with the postee) will not see this post or associate it with you. EVER. Furthermore, you unfriended the posteee months before. Worse, you BLOCKED the person. In FB terms, that person is dead to you and vice versa. There are no associations, connections, links or ties. This is how BLOCKING works.

Still unnecessarily worried that this generic post that doesn't reference you, appear on your forum, show up in public may implicate you in your stupidity during a job search? read below for the fix:

Easy-peasy, fresh and sleazy, just go to www.facebook.com. Log in. On the upper right hand side you will see your name, "home," and a tiny little arrow pointing down. Hover over that sneaky arrow and options will pop up, namely, "privacy settings." This is how you adjust EVERYTHING form pics to post to personal information on who can see what. Everyone, friends, friends of friends, acquaintances. These are your options on just about everything. That nifty little "tag" option so friends can post embarrassing photos of you? Change your privacy settings and that will never happen again.

Thank you, Mark Zuckerberg et al for realizing not everyone needs to be all up in my biz. Personally, I prefer friends of friends have the ability to private message me, photos are only seen by friends, but even acquaintances can view my posts, because they must know what I had for dinner and what I thought of that car who tailgated me on the freeway. Sidenote-Don't text FB status updates and drive.

Now that you have adjusted your privacy settings that controls not only who sees what you post, but also what others can post about you, you can rest assured your reputation will remain intact and untainted.


Now, please get the fuck out of my business, DO NOT designate what I can and cannot say on my OWN page that in no way is affiliated with you and please stop making me out to be the bad guy. You can't even confirm you were the subject for the post.

Until now.

You are totally a fucktard. I hate your guts. If you mess with me again, I WILL name names. I WILL ruin your life. The fact that you are a fucktard is no secret. I know REAL secrets. About you. About your family. MY family (until you designated me black sheep).

You can say whatever you want about me. That's your right. But you KNOW what you're saying is all lies and you're nothing but a mean, petty, spiteful, horrible human being. Say what you want, when you want to whoever you want. Because I have Facebook.

And Facebook Ruins Lives.


Friday, February 17, 2012

Random Pics of Vegas

Random Pics-California edition!
Under the pier at Huntington Beach


Huntington Beach

Because I know someone named Fritz

Universal Studios Citywalk

Universal Studios Citywalk

Marilyn Monroe out of Jelly Beans

Universal Studios Citywalk

Curious George parking

Los Angeles



Bob's Big Boy


Random Pics of Vegas

It's been a while, but I present Random Pics of the Las Vegas Art District-Daytime Edition. Enjoy:

Way creepier in person!


My handsome husband.





Really cool mural.

These Blues Brothers bobble heads were enormous!

Massive chairs fit for royalty. Seriously, they were as large as Renaissance thrones.

Friday, February 3, 2012

Sophie & Carter by Chelsea Fine


So I was browsing Amazon's selection of books recommended for me based on my purchases and ratings. I spun down a veritable rabbit hole of "Those who purchased THIS also purchased THESE" selections and wound up at Anew: The Archers of Avalon (Book One) by Chelsea Fine. The description sounded tantalizing, but I wanted to know more so I did something I rarely do-I scrolled down to see the reader reviews. Ironic, I know, that I should review books for others but typically hate reading others reviews. It's just that, nobody ever seems to get it right. And they are always so contradicting. Several people can LOVE a book that others absolutely HATE. In the end, I might as well skip the reviews, read the damn book and judge it for myself. 

Lucky for you, I'm here with the final call on what you should (and shouldn't) read. 

Sophie & Carter is a  MUST-READ. 

So, while there weren't any reviews on the new book, the consensus was clear on Chelsea Fine's debut. Readers raved about the raw, intense, binding friendship and love that evolves between Sophie and Carter. Next-door neighbors with less-than-perfect (understatement of the year) family lives that build a friendship based on trust and understanding. As they grow closer to graduation, they grow closer to each other. However, no paperback copies existed on my beloved Amazon or at BN.com. 

What was a girl to do?

I promptly downloaded Kindle for PC and bought the $2.99 e-book. It was a little pricey for 117 pages of story, but those pages captured such emotions, the book felt like it was bursting at the seams. Metaphorically, of course. It was a great, albeit short, beginning, middle and end. Everything goes as it's supposed to. Narration switches between Sophie and Carter as each chapter mirrors the next in a range of stories, emotions and struggles. Although there was enough content to satisfy, I desperately want more of these characters and really hope there's a follow up novel on the next chapter of their lives. 

My ONLY pet peeve? RHETORICAL. Not redundant. If you read the book, you'll see this glaring anomaly of nonsense. Seriously beautiful writing, but please choose the correct word or it messes up the whole flow of your sentence. It breaks my concentration when I am forced to re-read, then mentally correct your ridiculous mistake. 

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

What NOT to Say in a PC World

So you have the major items that draw debate: You can no longer say "retard" because it offends the mentally challenged individuals who process information at a slower than average rate. Fine. I'll agree to take offense.

My mom is no longer "Deaf." No, she hasn't miraculously regained her hearing, but sometime around 2001 she became "hearing impaired." Maybe because she was born with the disability, she deserves this PC title, but I don't hear any old-timers getting their panties in a bunch over losing their hearing and you know, going deaf, then being offended by it. Of course, are they demanding we call them age-impaired? But you get better with age, as many folks North of 40 spout religiously, so I guess age is not a PC hot topic.

Let's discuss race, then. Pick your race then tag -American at the end. I understand "Nigger" is a derogatory term for black people. But not when you're black and you're talking to someone black and you say the word as LAZILY AS POSSIBLE (i.e. niga, nicka, ne-ya). However, I can be labeled a food (cracker, for those of you not in the know) and have to accept that nickname? I can't even "retaliate" to your white reference by calling you black. Something you clearly ARE. I have to say you are African-American. Take a look around and count the number of black people that actually came from Africa or have parents that hailed from Africa. In most cases, you will find America born-and-bred for several generations. My great grandparents were from Germany. Does that make me German-American? Maybe. Do I say that? NO. I live in America and have never visited Germany-nor have my parents. Funny thing is, coming from the Southwest we are overrun with imports from Mexico. Kids, parents, grandparents, HUGE families come to the U.S.-legally and otherwise- for this so-called "better life" (pre-recession, of course). They actually have Mexican culture and heritage. They speak Spanish. They make authentic tamales and guac! They are most deserved of the title Mexican-American as a nice PC blend of their past and present culture. But, in my experience, Mexican's are so proud of their Mexican culture that they balk at any reference to being Americans. Mexicans have the audacity to drop the -American we so graciously grant them! What a slap in the PC face?!

How about religion? There's a nice non-PC topic. America was founded by folks searching for freedom from religious persecution (among other ideals). They included the clause that there should be a separation of Church and State (meaning, religion doesn't rule the Nation). However, we Pledge our Allegiance to "One Nation, Under God." I feel like there should be some sort of Venn Diagram or Flow Chart to help map this historical mindfuck.
My faith in Humanity only goes so far.

Now, we can't just opt out of saying the Pledge of Allegiance in our classrooms like reasonable, tolerant, mature and independent-thinking citizens. We have to FIGHT to get that nasty religious reference out. Forget time-honored tradition and harmless oaths. Then again, maybe Mexico has no such country oath and that's why so many beaners invade America? Now, I grew up saying the Pledge of Allegiance every morning in class for several years. Sometime around 4th grade, I was able to rationally question what I was saying and pledging to. Because I wasn't raised in a church-going family (single mother and all-GASP!), I knew of God and religion, but not much. I asked my mom. She believes in God and took me to a few different churches of varying Christian beliefs. I realized-FOR MYSELF- that God is a mythical being created by Man to rationalize life and death; the AfterLife is the belief that there is something more powerful than what we currently perceive thus creating a reason to live morally and ethically; and the Bible is a book of Old Wives Tales and fantastical stories created to inspire, teach, and mold how we shape our morals. I went back to school and continued to say the Pledge of Allegiance-as I loved my country and was proud to swear fealty- but I intentionally left out "Under God." Agree to disagree. And I was in 4th grade.

Why do we need to fight about this? If you are religious, then there is no problem saying "Under God" or having God printed on our currency. If you are not religious, then simply omit the words, do not say the Pledge at all, and don't use the money-pay for everything on your handy-dandy credit/debit card! Same for Creation vs Evolution. Let science teach, you know, SCIENCE-that which is based on FACT with evidentiary support- and teach Creation at home. Problem solved, now let's all get along.

Now, don't go thinking I'm the Anti-Christ and all because of my non-traditional views. I respect religion of all shapes, colors and sizes for how it teaches us to interact as decent human beings, and the strength and faith belief in a Higher Power can bring. There's peace and acceptance and love in religion that is very important on a fundamental level. 

religious extremist past (i.e. Branch Davidians near Waco, TX and Warren Jeffs FLDS Chruch in UT). Not everyone can be judge by the actions of everyone else in a similar group. That is called stereotyping. THAT is what is Politically Incorrect. 

In fact, comedy is the only time we should make light of stereotypes and ignorance because it brings to surface real issues. It allows people to laugh at one another-and at themselves-which allows a sense of unity that we ALL possess something that makes us difference, and that is okay. You have a funny accent, my skin is a different color, people of a certain age typically behave this way. Stereotypes are OKAY when everyone understand that they ARE IN FACT STEREOTYPES and not indicative of an entire race, age, culture, religion, lifestyle, gender, etc. We only have ourselves to blame when a stereotype is created and perpetuated.   It isn't laughing at a group of people who traditionally say, behave, eat, drink, or look a certain way that keeps the stereotype going. It's when a group of kids from New Jersey get a reality TV show that shows them with big hair, fake tans, hard bodies and wild accents boozing it up that creates and perpetuates the image of "Italian-Americans." It's the rap music video with drug and alcohol references, scantily-clad women dancing provocatively to lyrics making light violence, promiscuity, and illegal activities that perpetuates the stereotypical image of black teenagers who dress as if they were in that music video. It's Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie and Kim Kardashian who give bored rich girls a bad name. Stereotypes are funny because they are based on some kernal of truth. They are not PC at all, but they can give us great comedy:


And not so great comedy:
Oh, but it still isn't okay to do Black Face?


So when does a stereotype or comedic reference go too far? At what point do the civil liberties group and Advocates and varying I-Disagree-With-Everything-ers decide enough is enough and this is too offensive? 

When Christian Siriano, an openly gay male has to apologize to GLAAD for for his fierce catchphrase a "hot tranny mess" and likening trannies in the gay community to white trash in the heterosexual community? Was the transgendered  community really in that much of an uproar? More importantly, where were the Christian, redneck, white-trash, and heterosexual advocates outraged by being compared to trannies? The whole thing is absurd! (see: http://www.tvguide.com/news/Christian-Siriano-Offers-12020.aspx

Short people (vertically-challenged?) should not be called midgets. It's offensive. But Willy-Wonka can have Oompa Loompas-a bunch of short, orange people, running his chocolate factory. But if you call a short person an Oompa Loompa on the street, it's offensive. 

Actor Verne Troyer gained fame and notoriety by portraying "Mini-Me," the pint-sized version of Mike Meyers' character Dr. Evil. It's acceptable to call children "Mini-Me" as they are mini versions of their parents. But it's ignorant to refer to a short person as a miniature version of a full person. Even though that's EXACTLY what the movie did. And that garnered relatively low criticism from the short community. 


Also, I've yet to see Christmas boycotted for the overabundant use of short elves. 

Here's the latest issue to cause outrage: Stop Animation Film The Pirates! Band of Misfits offending leprosy campaigning groups. Please read this, because I cannot possibly go into more details without my head exploding from the absolute inanity of it. 

My honest question is why the Pirate community isn't more offended by their portrayal in this and other movies. 
Pictured: Pirate


Why stop at this family-friendly animation when there's more hard-hitting offenses out there in new cinema?Let's take a look at these new releases and why it upsets me that no one is picketing:

One For The Money starring Katherine Heigl has in it's very premise that working for a bail-bondsman is a last resort for the heroine. Member of PBUS (Professional Bail Agents of the United States) should be PISSED that this movie perpetuates the myth that bail agents are sleazy, uncouth, and unconventional jobs. If nothing else, Dog the Bounty Hunter should stand up for his chosen profession! 
Bail Enforcement Agents play a vital role in the economy and should be respected as the vigilante justice keepers they are!


The Grey stars Liam Neeson as a plane crash survivor in Alaska trying to stay alive in the wild as wolves hunt his intruding group. Goodness! Where do I even begin to be offended? First of all, PETA should be involved because this portrays wild animals behaving naturally in a natural, wild setting-which is detrimental to humans and will likely cause chaos and animosity toward these wild animals in their natural setting (re: Jaws). 

I'm surprised Sarah Palin hasn't spoke up to defend her great State. Travel Alaska, the State's official travel information and vacation source should be picketing against the movie's negative simulation of the Alaskan countryside. Surely, they take offense that this movie promotes Alaska as a wild and dangerous place that no one should dare travel to? 

Finally, there's the multi-billion dollar plane industry that should boycotting this movie and forcing a cease and desist of release because it clearly discriminates against air travel. Why couldn't it have been a cruise ship that left the oil miners stranded in Alaska instead of a plane crash? And let's not forget, according to USA Today, "Statistically speaking, flying is far safer than driving" (Don't believe me? CLICK HERE). 

This last one is a doozy. The poster and premise utilize perceived suicide as a possible option, although, it's not actually about a suicide, it's about the distraction of suicide to cover a much bigger, covert operation. Survivors of Suicide, a support group, should take offense to Man on a Ledge's chosen "distraction." Suicide is a serious problem plaguing the United States today with many youths and young adults seeing it as their only option rather than live with their everyday emotions and situation. Yet, this movie utilizes the possibility of a person killing themselves as a spectacle. I can't fathom how Leprosy Advocates can speak louder than Suicide Survivors and families affected by suicide. 

Also, I'm waiting for the Business Architects Association to speak up against the unfair portrayal of ledges as being unsafe. Because, let's face it, gravity kills people more often than ledge's do.